tricky.

It is a tricky thing to be a mama & have your heart live outside of your body.  You want what is best for your little ones.  You don't want them to have their feelings hurt or to feel disappointment or loss.  You want to protect them from all of it.  Yet, the tricky part is it would be a disservice to them if we did that.  If we shielded them from all of the emotional threats that may come their way & insisted they live under our bubble of protection how would they grow into effective & healthy adults?  How would they be able to function with all of the hurt, disappointments & struggles that come along with all of the adult stuff?  How would they know to turn to a savior to find their comfort & to place their burdens?

That being said it is no fun at all to have your little one come home & say "So & So doesn't want to be my friend anymore."  When I heard that it was literally like someone sucker punched me.  Why wouldn't anyone NOT want to be friends with my kiddo I asked myself?  This amazing, fun, creative kid?!  Then I reeled myself in & started wondering what my kid did to the other kid in order to garner this response.  Then I started thinking about how much more awful things kids could & do say to one another.  Then I wondered if my kid took it out of context or if the other kid even really knew what he was saying.  I didn't want to go all mama bear like I did when this same kid would get pushed down as a toddler at the local park I just hurt for his hurt.  I could feel his sadness & disappointment & I wanted to make it all better with hugs & words & maybe some ice cream?  Okay not ice cream, but wouldn't that be awesome (maybe not for our waistlines) if a scoop of cookies & cream really did make everything better?  I would have a freezer full of the stuff if it actually worked.

 So instead of passing on my emotional eating issues to my 6-year-old I did the only thing I could do.  I asked him how it made him feel, we chatted & I prayed.  Prayed about not letting my relationship "junk" become his issues, prayed about the friends to come, prayed about how thankful I was that God will never leave my little guy & how He is the best friend my kiddo will ever encounter & I am so thankful.  I gave my son  & his relationships over to God & I have a sneaky feeling this will be something I will have to do over & over & over throughout his life.  Amazing how resilient little ones are as he was over it in a second & just wanted to know if he could go play.  I imagine eye rolling & sighing will be interjected into future like conversations, but for now I am just thankful he trusted his little heart to me & thankful I didn't get an ice cream headache from stuffing my face with some cookies & cream.