Monday, June 24, 2013

connect.


I spent the past weekend with a great group of girls talking about what it meant to embrace our mess. How our lives as moms are a beautiful mess.  I really like that. I like the idea of seeing my messy life through the lens of  beautiful.  That doesn't mean it is put together, or pretty, or even ascetically pleasing at times, but it does mean it is real, revealing, open, and that there is no reason to hide out on account of my mess.  Rather we should embrace it it all it's messy glory! Because it tells the tale of who we are.  Of what we are going through in this season of mommy hood when you don't get to shower every day & on the days you do there is no guarantee that you aren't going to have to referee an argument from the shower, or  even worse have someone come in to poop at the same time you are trying to get clean & refreshed for the day.  Seriously isn't that the worst?  Our house has one bathroom & the shower has glass doors. Um...need I say more as the only female in the house?  Needless to say we recently hung up a shower rod & shower curtain over the previously mentioned glass doors so mama could get a little privacy.

The  concept of embracing your messy life sounds totally freeing.  Let it all  out & let's be real & let's connect & be honest about how it is going.  Because really... Who is good?  All the time? Each time you ask them?

These days we have such advantages to stay "connected" with people via the information super highway. Maybe it's just me, but  I kind of have a love/hate relationship with the likes of Facebook, Pinterest & blogs.  I absolutely love having it all available to me & being able to learn from others & glean what I want, but I don't care for how it isn't always a true glimpse of real life.  But, I totally get it.  Who wants to post a pic of themselves without make-up when you can see the bags under your eyes or the ones of your kids with the weird milk crust around their mouths?  This past Christmas the only and I repeat only picture that turned out of our family in front of the tree had my youngest one with his finger up his nose. And no I did not share that one.

But all of this technology could be & sometimes is  really awesome.  It could be a way for us to connect and support & embrace one another & our struggles. To truly rejoice & mourn along side one another if you will.

You could look at it like no other era of motherhood has been so bombarded with pictures of perfect families or what craft you should make on a rainy day with those supplies you are supposed to just "happen" to have on hand,  you could let all of the connectedness lead you to comparisons, judgments, guilt & feeling down about yourself as a woman, wife & mother.

Or....what if we took advantage of the technology & saw it that no other era of motherhood has ever been so connected?  That when my mom had me, but had no other friends at the time with young ones she couldn't connect online with a chat group of other moms going through the exact same ups & downs.    Teething & blow outs.  She wouldn't have been able to join a facebook group & go on outings with other people that the only thing they had in common was that they both had  2 year olds  Or in any other time has a mom been able to send off a quick text to a friend saying: "Pray for me.  I am going to loose it" (because her baby won't nap & it's nap time & doesn't he know it's nap time & why isn't he napping?!) & know as she throws her phone down that her friend will be praying for her in nano seconds?  When have moms been able to listen to a message from their favorite author, pastor, speaker on a podcast while folding mounds of laundry, doing the dishes, or zoning out driving errands from Costco to Fred Meyer to Trader Joe's?

Yes, motherhood can be a lonely gig even in the midst of all this.  But, it doesn't have to be.  We have the freedom to reach out at any moment & connect with someone.  To laugh with, to cry with, to you won't believe what happened with...they won't always call/text/message us first.  We may have to initiate it, but sometimes taking that step to muster up a little bit of courage to put ourselves out there could be the difference between being lonely & being loved on.






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